Dependence Day
This study by the Heritage Foundation illustrates what little independence the American People have left.
We should decommission the Fourth of July as Independence Day and make Roosevelt`s birthday, or the anniversary of Chappaquiddick, or the date of Hillary Clinton`s menopause, or some such a new holiday-Dependence Day! Instead of barbecues we can stand in soup lines while listening to speeches by Dick Durban, instead of fireworks we can shoot saturday night specials at unsuspecting liquor store owners, we can picket for more government welfare instead of hold parades honoring our founding fathers. Of course, in honor of Ted Kennedy, we must insist on free beer, and life guards should be stationed near any bridges which happen to cross running water...
You may say I`m a dreamer, but I`m not the only one. Someday America will join the Democrat Party and, with tax increases on the wealthy, we can make all of our dreams come true...
It looks like this is closer than we think.
We should decommission the Fourth of July as Independence Day and make Roosevelt`s birthday, or the anniversary of Chappaquiddick, or the date of Hillary Clinton`s menopause, or some such a new holiday-Dependence Day! Instead of barbecues we can stand in soup lines while listening to speeches by Dick Durban, instead of fireworks we can shoot saturday night specials at unsuspecting liquor store owners, we can picket for more government welfare instead of hold parades honoring our founding fathers. Of course, in honor of Ted Kennedy, we must insist on free beer, and life guards should be stationed near any bridges which happen to cross running water...
You may say I`m a dreamer, but I`m not the only one. Someday America will join the Democrat Party and, with tax increases on the wealthy, we can make all of our dreams come true...
It looks like this is closer than we think.
posted by Timothy Birdnow | 3:26 PM
3 Comments:
Here's a factoid for you: On the same day that the Washington Post headlined the first manned landing on the moon, there was an additional headline about Teddy's adventure at Chappaquiddick. I know this because my husband collects moon-landing memorabilia and has the newspaper I mentioned above. I'll bet you can come up with an interesing national holiday which will accommodate those simultanaeous events.
How about Oxygen Day?
How about 'Depends' day? The muslim excusers could wear a used one on their head to honor them.
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