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Location: St. Louis, Missouri, United States

Saturday, July 09, 2011

Kuragira; the Great Jellyfish and George Monbiot

Timothy Birdnow

First there was Godzilla, then Rodan, then Mothra and Ghidorah, and now...

Overfishing and ocean acidification has created Kuragira, the monster jellyfish!

Yes, just as Godzilla was born of French nuclear tests in the South Pacific, so - according to George Moonbat, er, Monbiot, Global Warming is producing the latest monster in the endless saga, this one a giant jellyfish.

Yes, an invasion of the spineless stingers is immanent, and human civilization - along with the kingdom of the vertebrates in general - shall fall because of Man's poisoning of the air and waters. Monbiot claims:

"But I could also see something else. Jellyfish. Unimaginable numbers of them. Not the transparent cocktail umbrellas I was used to, but solid, white rubbery creatures the size of footballs. They roiled in the surface or loomed, vast and pale, in the depths. There was scarcely a cubic metre of water without one.

Apart from that – nothing. It wasn't until I reached a buoy three miles from the shore that I felt the urgent tap of a fish, and brought up a single, juvenile mackerel. Otherwise, though I paddled to all the likely spots, I detected nothing but the jellyfish rubbing against the line. As I returned to shore I hooked a greater weever – which thrashed around the boat, trying to impale me on its poisonous spines. But that was all.

Is this the moment? Have I just witnessed the beginning of the end of vertebrate ecology here? If so, the shift might not be confined to Cardigan Bay. In a perfect conjunction of two of my recent interests, last week a monstrous swarm of jellyfish succeeded where Greenpeace has failed, and shut down both reactors at the Torness nuclear power station in Scotland.

The Israeli branch of Jellyfish Action pulled off a similar feat at the nuclear power station in Hadera this week.

A combination of overfishing and ocean acidification (caused by rising concentrations of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere) has created the perfect conditions for this shift from a system dominated by fish to a system dominated by jellyfish.

If this is indeed what we're seeing, the end of vertebrate ecology is a direct result of the end of vertebrate politics: the utter spinelessness of the people charged with protecting the life of the seas. In 2009 the Spanish fleet, for example, vastly exceeded its quota, netting twice the allowable catch of mackerel in the Cantabrian Sea, and no one stopped them until it was too late."

End excerpt.

So, the jellyfish are coming, the result of Man's foolish tampering with Nature, and soon a great Chrysaora shall climb from the slime of the Central Sea and ravage Tokyo. Will Godzilla show up to stop it? Maybe Mothra can wrap it in silk and Rodan fly it to the North Pole to freeze, much like The Blob was dropped there to slumber in eternal frost. But then, global warming is melting the poles, and both Kuragira and the Blob may emerge. Maybe they'll fall in love and make a bunch of little Kuragira blobs, to engulf the world?

They own the oceans! Soon they will cover the land with doom!

How long before Godzilla himself becomes extinct as his habitat is destroyed by the pernicious Kuragira?

Global Warming has truly turned into a terrible B monster movie.

(Kujagira is a combination of Kurage, or jellyfish, and kujira, or whale; Godzilla's name was an anglicized form of Kujira and Gojira, or Gorilla becomming Godjira, or in the West Godzilla. I doubt my created name is proper Japanese, my knowing exactly none of the aforementioned language. I got the information on Godzilla from Wikipedia.)

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